CPT C in Iraq

This will be my last blog!

2005-11-22T04:36:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone:

I'm back from Iraq! It was a real eye-opening set of experiences that have certainly made me appreciate what we are doing over there and the good work that is going on to help the Iraqi people. I'm glad that each of you have (over the months) had a chance to visit the web site I set up and follow with me on the adventures I had from time to time. Of course, it feels great to be back and I am grateful for the support each of you have given me and my family while I was deployed. I was able to come home earlier than expected because we had accomplished our mission and team objectives sooner than originally planned.

As you might have seen on TV or CNN/FOX, the military is trying to find ways to "work ourselves out of a job" over there so that Iraqi's can take over basic government functions and run their own country.

I cannot tell you how great it feels to be back. I have spent quite a bit of time with my family and everyone is doing fantastic.

I would love to hear from all of you in this "close-out" blog. Write when you can...I will leave this website open until Christmas and then take the entries and put them in some kind of "Creative Memories" thing. Write when you can.

CPT C

Election results in Iraq

2005-10-24T22:18:00.000-07:00

I know the final votes have not been tallied yet but I am so happy over the participation rate during this election. The January, 2005 elections were hailed as a great success but surely this one will be recorded as one even better. My personal theory on why we ultimately will have a YES on the referendum is that the Sunni-Arabs were "allowed" to vote by their leaders this time. Back in January, many Sunni's were told not to vote and were harassed, threatened, and, in some cases, subject to physical violence if they did vote. I believe that many Sunni's did vote AND some of those that did vote actually voted YES instead of NO. So...over here I am very happy that so many participated in the election. I hope the result is a YES but even if it is a NO, that in itself is a victory for the Iraqis because they used the polling stations to effect change rather than using an AK-47 or an IED (Improved Explosive Device)...

I was interviewed

2005-10-08T01:18:00.000-07:00

Hey folks

Just a quick note to say I was interviewed by my hometown newspaper. Here is the link to the website.

http://www.timesdispatch.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=RTD/MGArticle/RTD_BasicArticle&c=MGArticle&cid=1031785412483

Let me know if there is any problem accessing this site. Thanks.

October is here - yeaaaaa

2005-10-01T00:00:00.000-07:00

Hey folks: I have been having trouble posting pictures to the web site so I might have to go purely text-based from now on...The past few weeks have been quite busy for me. We have been doing our usual "outside the wire" missions, going to city neighborhoods and assessing the living conditions, taking pictures, chatting with the locals, etc...and of course handing out candy and beanie babies whenever we can. This past week I took some folks out to Lake Dokan in the northeastern part of Iraq and we actually got to swim in a huge lake. President Talabani (spelling?) has a house there - he is the President of Iraq. Anyway, we had a great time there - there was work involved but I try to have fun (in a safe way of course) while we are out sometimes. A couple of days ago we assessed a city sector/neighborhood and got to check out one of the city's oldest fortresses...apparently this historical landmark is at least 2,000 years old - that was fun.

I am so glad we are in October - another month"bites the dust".

An interesting sight at a local school

2005-09-11T04:31:00.000-07:00

The other day we went out to visit a city neighborhood and came across some graffiti at one of the local schools – which happened to be almost 100% Arab, as opposed to Kurdish population. The graffiti said “Long live the great Jihad warrior Saddam Hussein”. I promptly got a spray can from another soldier and commenced to spray over the graffiti. The nearby kids seemed to enjoy me doing the spraying. It is hard to tell who actually still supports the “enemy” when I am out and about speaking with doctors, business owners, children, gas station operators, police officers, etc. Perhaps some of the people I speak with are pro-USA during the day but anti-USA at night – I don’t know, probably will never know. The main thing I would like to see amongst the general population, regardless of their feelings towards the U.S. forces is that they get out and vote in October…and then again in December.

2005-09-06T22:16:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of a mall in Doha, Qatar. Yes, that is a skating rink in the middle of the mall. My unit commander authorized me to go on a four day pass to Doha, Qatar. How could I pass that up! What a difference Qatar is from Iraq, as you can imagine. Qatar is an extremely wealthy country - I just read today that Qatar has donated $100 million to the US for the Hurricane Relief Fund. Wealth is evident everywhere - upscale mall, booming skyscrapers in construction, no trash on the streets or even poor people, etc. Iraq is almost at the complete opposite of the spectrum - crumbling, ancient infrastructure, trash everywhere, little construction, and threats of violence constant in the air. Here in Qatar, the base here offers MWR activities (MWR = morale, welfare, and recreation). The other day I took a trip to a local mall and except for most of the shoppers wearing either long flowing white robes (men) or long flowing black robes (women) I would have thought I was back in the USA at an upscale mall - very impressive.

It is nice to take a break after being �in-country� for a little over three months - where has the time gone? It is nice to wake up and have absolutely no responsibilities - the questions of the day around here are: should I go to the pool after or before my run? How much reading time do I want to do before the free movie starts at the base theater? Should I go for chicken quesadillas or ribs? J

The summer is over - and I think about the school season starting for my daughters. Another season has commenced - my favorite one actually being the fall. I hope everyone has enjoyed their summer and is looking forward to this fall season with their friends and families.

2005-09-06T22:07:00.000-07:00

Hey folks. I was lucky enough to go to Doha, Qatar for several days on a "MWR" pass which stands for morale, welfare, and recreation. At the base I stayed at they offered some tours. This is me trying to look like a model on the back of a boat in the Persian Gulf just off of the capital city of Qatar (Doha). The whole trip was very relaxing which was good because I was starting to get a little edgy with my buddies...so the break was nice.

2005-08-18T02:34:00.001-07:00

Everybody wants to get photographed! :-)

2005-08-18T02:34:00.000-07:00

Some boys that want to take me on in soccer!

2005-08-18T02:33:00.000-07:00

A proud father!

2005-08-18T02:32:00.000-07:00

Hey folks. Sorry for taking so long to write. A lot has happened since I last wrote - of course it is all good. I am now living on a very nice base with all the amenities that you would expect from a military base - gym, three hot meals a day, plenty of air conditioning, etc. My roommate is very easy to live with which makes the time go by fast. This picture was taken when we went out into the city and met some Kurdish families that were returning to their city. A little history is in order - several years ago Saddam Hussein ordered many Kurds to leave their native cities and forced many Arabs to populate those areas that had traditionally been Kurdish...I guess he wanted to break up a potential political coup or something like that...anyway in my part of Iraq there are many, many folks that are now returning to lands and cities where they once lived. The guy center stage of this photograph is one of my favorite interpreters...I call him "Big Glasses". I wrote about him in an earlier blog. He is great to work with and speaks several languages! As I work with him and others in trying to assess living conditions and people's needs one thing is universal - humor. The other day I was visiting a primary school and was interviewing the principal, a middle-aged lady. Anyway, when I asked her if she minded if we take her photograph I also asked her what her favorite side was - left or right...with a smile. They all laughed in the room.

2005-07-20T21:19:00.000-07:00

This is the first of several pictures taken from a day trip to a large, beautiful lake resort area in northern Iraq. In this picture, we were relaxing by part of the lake where folks eat food, play music, etc. I was able to meet a family visiting from Baghdad. In this picture, the mother basically said "please hold him - give me a break for a while!". Everyone in the picnic area where we were by the river was very nice to us. One of the guys even let me play my ecletic (spelling?) music CD on his car stereo. Imagine me eating kebabs while listening to Spandau Ballet in the background!

2005-07-20T21:17:00.001-07:00

Isn't it gorgeous?

2005-07-20T21:17:00.000-07:00

Here is the lake. The previous picture is my team.

2005-07-20T21:16:00.000-07:00

I thought you would like to see some pictures from a recent day trip we took to a very large lake in northern Iraq. We went there to do some business but were also able to take advantage of some "down time" to relax a little, meet some folks who were vacationing from Baghdad, and eat some local food. The water was very cool - beautiful scenery as you can see.

May I introduce you to "Murphy's Law"

2005-07-17T22:08:00.000-07:00

Sorry I have not written in a while. I could give you some really creative excuses ... but I really only have one boring one - time has flown.

Each day goes by so incredibly fast. Before I know it August will be upon us. The work that I am doing is not very difficult but it does require a lot of planning and follow through. Some of you may have heard of Murphy's Law - for those that don't know, Murphy's Law states that if there is the slightest possibility of something going wrong it will go wrong. Basically, "Murphy" is the ultimate pessimist. I bring this law up because much of my time is making sure "Murphy" does not raise his ugly head when we are out and about on missions. For example, if there is the chance that someone may forget to wake up on time, I have a senior sergeant wake the person up 15 minutes earlier; if the team as a whole is not moving the way I want them to in the morning before we head out "outside the wire" and we are running the risk of forgetting something important, then so that Murphy does not "bite us", we form up for inspection 30 minutes earlier than usual....you get my drift right?

Well, in my world right now - which is filled with plans, briefings, guns, radios, coordinations with many other organizations we are supporting in this area, e-mails, meetings, and (oh yes) the Iraqi people - most of my time is spent making sure that the primary mission for the day is accomplished - which is everyone comes back with all their fingers and toes. I am always conscious of that Murphy guy!

If everyone comes back safe, we have had a good day. The secondary mission is whatever work we had to do for that day - whether it was conducting an assessment in part of a large city, or visiting with government officials to discuss a specific issue or broad range of issues, or conducting a goodwill visit to a hospital, school, or village to meet/greet folks and hand out supplies and/or beanie babies.

Then, at the end of the day I still have from 6 pm to about 9:30 pm to do catch up work and do other types of planning. I am hoping that my schedule will allow me to actually attend church on Sundays as well as have a lot more personal time in the evening. We shall see.

And given all of the above, I must say that I am enjoying the work. I am able to implement some initiatives and improvements in the way that we work over here and in the quality of products we produce.

How is life over in the US of A for each of you? Please write when you can I love to hear from each of you.

Big Glasses

2005-07-03T21:19:00.000-07:00

I have three interpreters assigned to my team. Each one has his own personality and they are all great to work with. Depending on the area we go to, they need to be able to speak either Kurdish or Arabic…and in some cases Turkomen. I know some basic words of greeting for both Kurdish and Arabic. For example, with Arabic, if you want to say hello, great to see you, and my name is CPT C, you would say (say it with me) …”Ah sah lam a lay koom”(hello and great to see you)….” “Kife hah lik …momtazzz?” (How are things … excellent?” ) . In Kurdish, you would say the above English words as follows: “Choy nee Bashi” (are you doing well?)…”Zorr bash” (I am doing well).

So there you have it…you can now speak both Arabic and Kurdish! Well, enough to create a good first impression anyway. One of our interpreters has a name that is difficult to pronounce but he wears big glasses…so we call him “Big Glasses” and he does not seem to mind. However, everytime I hear his new name it makes me chuckle a little. I mean imagine calling one of your friends “Big Glasses” or “Large Nose” or something like that.

2005-06-26T21:09:00.000-07:00

Kurdish children

2005-06-26T21:08:00.000-07:00

A slice of life - a recent trip to northwestern Iraq.

The time is going fast...

2005-06-26T20:48:00.000-07:00

Days go by quickly around. Here is a typical day for me in June:

- wake up, shower, get dressed, grab by helmet, weapons, and body armor and head down to a meeting place where we live to receive the mission briefing for the day (it has been planned the night before by me)

- we go over all kinds of checklist items (are the vehicles ready, does everyone have ear protection, eye protection, enough ammunition, commo checks, etc.) and then we go "outside the wire" traveling in our up-armored vehicles

- typically we go to meetings with high level government officials, or we go review various infrastructure projects and report back to our headquarters on the project's status, or sometimes we combine our work meetings/activities with some goodwill mission. For example, yesterday we went to a hospital because some folks had to do some kind of assessment there. So I decided that while they were doing that my team would do a goodwill activity and hand out beanie babies and pens to folks in the hospital. I first went to the head nurse and introduced myself and explained why we were there. Then the way we worked it was that for the next 45 minutes or so we followed the head nurse as she handed out a beanie baby to either children, babies, or adults - one by one (that is why it took so long). But it was great because we got to visit folks in the children's ward, the pregnant mother's ward, and the older folks ward....and the hospital staff.

Why did we do that? Well, for one it is quite a morale boost after countless hours in the heat and driving around town sometimes not talking to too many people...and that we get to interact positively with the Iraqi people is quite a nice thing. The other reason is that I knew that some people in that hospital either activity support the insurgency or know someone that is in the insurgency, or are at least ambivalent about the whole thing. Thus, when we show up as Americans smiling and handing out gifts to them and their children, I have to believe that there are some of those folks out there that will be favorably influenced by our actions that we did yesterday. I cannot do anything about the hardened insurgents that want to die for Allah but my team can have some positive psychological impact on many others who are somewhat open to forming their own opinions about Americans, other than what some "biased" individuals are telling them in a mosque or over the radio or on television.

Either way, it was very gratifying to do such a thing and we will do many more activities at other locations while I am here.

2005-06-21T07:04:00.000-07:00

The other day we went on a little sightseeing trip!

According to the history of the land, the Babylonian Empire was predominantly in what we now call Iraq. There are several key historical sites in Iraq such as the birthplace of Abraham (Ur), the city of Babylon, the city of Nineveh (ref: Jonah and the whale), etc. If there are Old Testament scholars out there, you will recall the story of the prophet Daniel, covered in the Book of Daniel.

According to the Bible, three Jewish friends of Daniel: Shadrach, Meschach and Aben-nego, refused to worship a statue that King Nebuchadnezzar had built for his people. Because they refused to worship they were thrown into a fiery furnace that had been heated "to seven times its normal heat." Not only were they unharmed, but they were accompanied by a fourth figure who "looks like a god" and was later identified by Nebuchadnezzar as an angel.

Why am I writing all of this? Well, we were able to visit the purported site of the fiery furnace. It is called the �Eternal Flame� by the locals and for some reason the fires still burn to this day.

So, being the adventurous guy that I am, I decided to get my picture taken while in this �fiery furnace�. Yes, it was hot - I actually walked through the pit being very careful not to step on the actual fires and not to breathe too much since it was so hot. And, by the way, the place really, really smelled of sulphur. But I am glad I got to see a biblical place.

2005-06-14T21:06:00.000-07:00

The children here are absolutely beautiful. At times we will hand out beanie babies or candy or whatever we can get from the USA usually AFTER our meeting or site visit. I say after because mass crowds will appear from nowhere upon sighting of gifts from the Americans and it is definitely something you want to do when you are getting ready to leave some place as opposed to getting ready to start a meeting with someone....Aren't they cute!

2005-06-09T10:07:00.000-07:00

...and here are a group of us, including me with hair....in Qatar getting ready to come to Iraq, a couple of weeks ago....Iraq has NOTHING on Qatar when it comes to heat. When we were getting ready to de-board the plane someone told us it was 138 degrees and when I stepped off the plane I believed them.

2005-06-09T10:04:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of me right after I got my head shaved. I have wanted to do this for some time....and it is very hot here so why not.

An ice cold Pepsi

2005-06-08T20:56:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was able to go "downtown" and meet/greet a local government official as well as I guess you could call him a state director of public works for the province where I work. I am finding a fairly predictable custom when one meets with these good people - usually an older man will come in shortly after we have shook hands (and I have attempted a few words/phrases in Kurdish which sounds, by the way, completely different from Arabic)....and bring out the "chai" for us which is basically tea with a lot of sugar. Then he will bring out bottled water, followed by ice cold Pepsi cans! ... the cold Pepsi is particularly appreciated (I pass on the chai) given the hot, dry temperatures we are in.

The weather is hovering around the low 100's and it really is the dry heat kind. I am very thankful that the weather here is not similar to the humid/wet heat of North Carolina - I don't do well in humid weather.

Looking forward to the rest of my guys coming in so we can officially start our deployment...in the meantime I continue to scope out all of the good deals, etc and basically pave the way for them to come in with the least amount of confusion and aggravation.

On another note, it seems that there are no shower curtains that come with the showers. Instead the bathrooms are built in such a way that any water runoff from the shower simply goes down a hole in the middle of the bathroom...I am okay with all of this as long as the water continues to look clean and comes out of the shower head at more than a trickle pace.

Where is my digital camera when I need it?

2005-06-05T00:32:00.000-07:00

Yesterday visited a couple of camps where there are several hundred displaced persons/families that have no homes and are waiting to move into housing at some future point in time. The living conditions were pretty terrible but the people seemed (unbelievably) to be in fairly high spirits. It was a real eye opener to me viewing these areas and meeting with some of the officials in this area.

The Kurdish children are SO cute. I cannot tell you how many children's hands I shook or held; they all wanted to come up to the soldiers and touch them. We have received a number of care packages here; one such package was a bunch of beanie babies. So...I handed out my very first beanie baby to a beautiful little girl who was probably around 6 years old.

Went to church services this morning (Latter-Day Saints) which was very nice to be in a quiet, spiritual setting for about an hour.

I think I will have the opportunity to do some good things here.

My new mailing address

2005-06-02T15:19:00.000-07:00

My new mailing address is as follows:

CPT C
B/451 CA BN
FOB Warrior
APOE AE 09338

If anyone is interested in sending me a care package what I need are those aerosol cans (compressed oxygen) that are used to clean out one's computer keyboard. I am sure they are at Best Buy/Circuit City/Staples. Any sent would be definitely used and much appreciated - they are used to spray out the sand/dust that accumulates in the weapon systems we have.

Planes, trains, and automobiles

2005-06-01T20:54:00.000-07:00

The eagle has landed. After a few days in Qatar (wow, that is a furnace down there) and a few nights of sleeping, traveling, sleeping I am NEARLY at my final destination here in sunny Iraq. A few observations:

- all the lights going out inside the military transport plane as we were getting ready to land at an airfield in Iraq (it is part of the protocol they have hear to reduce the chances of planes getting shot at by insurgents - pretty smart really).

- the hugeness (is that a word?) of some of these US bases here in-country, complete with many of the modern necessities back home - even the chow halls are very good

- bottles, bottles everywhere: free bottled water and gatorade as far as the eye can see since we have been in the Middle East

- staying at locations that used to house some of the most wealthy/politically connected members of the Baathist Party back in the times of Saddam Hussein; for example I am visiting a recreation facility at one of the bases here (and using their internet facilities) which I think used to be one of Saddam's luxury hotels.

Overall, I am feeling great and looking forward to meeting some of the people I will be working with over the next several months.

2005-05-25T08:10:00.000-07:00

Here is another nature shot - hope you like it. Still working through how to post pictures easily to the website.

Marines are from Mars, Iraqis are from Venus

2005-05-25T05:52:00.000-07:00

I thought you might like to read an article that explains the differences between the USA mindset and the Arab mindset. It is written by some U.S. Marines but I think it is an interesting insight into how we view ourselves (speaking generally of course) here in the USA versus how others might view us. I am going to post it directly below since I am having diffculty posting a file attachment.

"Marines Are From Mars, Iraqis Are From Venus"
Major Ben Connable
First Marine Division G-2
30 May 2004

Introduction: Marines find themselves regularly frustrated by the behavior and reactions of the Iraqi people. There are very fundamental cultural differences between Americans and Arabs, but for a variety of reasons these differences are exaggerated between the Marine tribe and the Iraqi tribe. Our fundamental differences lead to fundamental misunderstandings. As we enter a period of ambiguity leading up to the transition, it may be helpful to look at how we deal with our Iraqi counterparts from a fresh perspective. American Marines and Iraqis are hardwired at far ends of a cultural void not by genetics, but by social conditioning.

These descriptions are necessarily simplified, skewed and hyperbolic toward the ideal to make a point. No two people are the same, not everyone lives up (or down) to the ideal.

AMERICAN MARINES:

People in general are hardwired to see obstacles or problems, find solutions for those problems, and execute those solutions. The American culture reinforces this natural instinct in what most other cultures consider an extreme manner. Americans focus on winning, achieving, succeeding, and producing. Our children learn and play aggressive, competitive sports from a very early age.
For example, football, arguably the most popular and widely played American sport is a linear, aggressive, goal-oriented endeavor that usually ends with concrete results. This is a simple construct that satisfies our basic needs. We see a problem (the other team, the goal line), we see a solution, (drive forward, score more points), and we can easily envision an end state – unambiguous victory. Ties are a disappointment, not a means to an end. In professional football we have done away with ties entirely because they don’t satisfy our Manichean need for a concrete solution.
As children, most of us are taught that lying and cheating are wrong, and that “honesty is always the best policy.” You might say that “honor” to an American means never quitting, never betraying your word, living up to a high standard of performance and behavior. “Honor” on the athletic field means playing by the rules and giving your best performance no matter what the conditions. People who give excuses for poor performance are deemed weak and are shunned.
When we are presented with challenges, we are expected to overcome them with personal initiative. People who overcome personal disaster are held up as examples to the rest of us. The worse the disaster faced, the greater the comeback, the better the story. The skier who breaks both legs in a fall and drags himself five miles for help is a hero, but it’s even better if he crawls all the way back to save his dog from an avalanche. Most Americans are generous to a fault, but we tend to lack respect for those who don’t help themselves. Most of us can (still) relate to statements like, “Pull yourself up by your bootstraps,” “Self-made man,” “I don’t take handouts.”
We see ourselves as separate and distinct individuals. Choosing our own relationships, memberships, associations, and path in life, we see it as standard practice to move 3000 miles across the country, away from family and friends, to “start over.” If we don’t like our families, we simply dissociate ourselves from them and seek other relationships. We marry and divorce with impunity, and often without input from friends or family. We decide what is best for ourselves. If we fail, we’re generally expected to view it as our own fault. We have responsibility to take care of our parents in their old age, but we often pay someone else to take this burden off our hands.
Most Americans are lucky enough to have a fairly high standard of living compared to the rest of the world. More than ninety percent of families can afford three full meals a day for their children and nearly everyone has an opportunity to go to school. Our safety is buffered by regulatory agencies that protect us from dirty water, dirty air, and even noise pollution. Although we have many bad neighborhoods, there is little threat from brutal torture, state-sponsored mass murder, oppressive martial law, or enemy invasion across our borders. Our health care isn’t perfect, but our life expectancy is high and most of us feel good about our futures.
In fact, our ability to envision our future is one of our greatest strengths. Because most of our basic survival needs are met, we have the luxury of a long-term view. Retirement planning is a normal part of life. Most Americans envision their children going on to college, and have no reason to expect they won’t be able to fulfill this expectation even if they have to take out student loans. We save money and plan our careers.
Our system of government gives us the perception that we also have a greater role in our collective future. Although many Americans say they feel disenfranchised, our ability to vote elected officials in and out of office gives us an avenue of participation. Our anger and frustration can be vented with the pull of a lever or a letter to our congressman. The fact that the congressman writes back and will probably look into each individual case would shock most people from the developing world.
The respect for the rule of law is the foundation of our way of life. We modify our daily behavior based on the belief that it’s our responsibility to follow laws, we will be punished if we don’t follow laws, and that most other people will follow laws. Law gives order, protects us from each other and from the government, and oftentimes from ourselves. Our faith in this system of laws is reflected in the amount of time we dedicate to following the creation of law in congress and the adjudication of law in the courts. Publicly, corruption is unacceptable, and when discovered it is usually rooted out.
We take great pride in being a free people. Our unquestioning belief in our rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness make us uniquely American. Unencumbered by the shackles of tyranny, our hearts host the seeds of generosity and altruism. Most of us have an unfailing belief that we make the most of our freedom, living good lives, helping others and trying to live up to our personal standards.
Our altruism and earnestness often make us somewhat naïve. We expect that everyone else can see that our hearts are pure, and we expect them to play by the Marquis of Queensbury rules that we try to live by ourselves. When we find out that people in the rest of the world necessarily live by a more survival-oriented set of rules, we’re often overly disappointed. We have trouble adjusting to other people’s way of life because we think our way of life is the ideal. We have trouble seeing things from other people’s eyes because we think they should always see things from our perspective.
Our sense of moral superiority comes from a real desire to help others and do the right thing, but it also gets in our way when we have to deal with those that live by more nebulous rules. Our earnest overtures are seen as false and naïve instead of moral and brave. Europeans cannot believe that we would sacrifice so much in Iraq just to prevent a WMD attack and to help the Iraqi people, because they would never do it themselves. If they have a hidden angle, we must have one too. Sometimes our lack of street smarts catches up to us. When we don’t live up to our own expectations on the national stage, we are our own worst enemies. The shame-fest over Abu Ghraib is a case study in American guilt.
Our national character is built on high moral concepts that not many of us live up to, but most of us aspire to. Our nature is to be strong, moral, and productive. We set the bar high.
American Marines take these characteristics and drive them to a new level. With notable exceptions, we tend to be exceptionally aggressive, mission focused, and strong believers in the American ideal. We do not accept weakness, indecision, laziness, or incompetence because we know that these things lead to death in combat. We drive ourselves past normal points of endurance, often damaging our own bodies just to reach a finish line or save a buddy. We expect no less from anyone else, a point that often leads to friction with our old high school friends, our families, and especially other Marines. We have been called extremists, and in many ways we are. Marines can best be described as “extreme Americans.”

…American Marines have unusually high expectations…

IRAQIS OF AL-ANBAR: (Fallujah is in this province - FYI)

Although we don’t like to call ourselves “Arabs,” the Iraqi culture is an Arabic culture. We are a communal people, and our lives revolve around our family; close, extended, and tribal. The paths of our lives are less lineal than the Americans, less “A to B,” more nebulous. Our sport of choice is also football, but not the American variety.
We play the sport played extensively everywhere in the world except America. Soccer isn’t a direct, aggressive kind of sport like the game you play. In fact, we spend a lot of time kicking the ball backwards instead of towards the goal. Much time is spent on the field lining up shots, less time shooting. The goal is to win, but a tie is okay as long as it was a good tie. We often view a tie as a victory if it is against a better team.
Our perception of victory and success is often malleable to the circumstances. Our honor demands victory, we have trouble accepting anything less. We’re not lying to ourselves; we just adjust the standards to fit the situation. The Gulf War was a victory for Saddam because we prevented you from driving into Baghdad. Despite the fact that we were losing on the field, Fallujah is a victory because you could not finish the attack – our will to hold out defeated your will to crush our forces. If you push us into a position where we have obviously lost, we become distraught and angry, and our honor demands that we seek a victory to balance things out. This is no different from you – Americans hate losing as well. It is different from you because to us it is all that matters.
This sense of honor permeates everything we do. This isn’t the Western definition of honor; it’s more like Hispanic honor. Perception of manhood is vital, and in fact it can be a matter of life and death. A man without honor gets no wife, often no work, and in Iraq he may be shunned or killed by his family depending on how grave the offense. Defending honor is part of our cultural heritage and it is a focal point for our behavior. We protect the virtue of our women and the pride of our family. We are disgusted that American men allow their women to act and dress like “sharmuta,” or prostitutes. If our wives dressed in public like Brittany Spears we would kill them or burn them with cooking oil.
An Iraqi man unable to support his family has no honor and must take action to counterbalance this loss. It doesn’t necessarily matter how we support our families as long as we provide. In many cases, we are pushed out the door by our wives to conduct attacks against the Coalition to regain our honor and to make money. An Iraqi woman knows that a husband without honor is worthless to her and her children.
Saddam was a terrible father, but many of us loved him as an abused child loves the parents who beat him. We still act like abused children, playing one side against the other, looking for an advantage, support, and acceptance. We will play you against your boss, against your civil/military organizations, and against the government to get what we want. Don’t expect loyalty from us, we are survivors. When we give loyalty to a cause it is to God’s cause. When we give loyalty to people it is to our family.
When we are presented with challenges, we accept the fate prescribed by God. Acceptance of fate is an Islamic trait, and it guides almost everything we do. If we are poor, then it is Gods will that we are poor. If there is a task to be completed, then by the will of God it will be completed – In Sha Allah. In many cases, except for those of us educated in Baghdad or the west, we see no reason to put extra effort into succeeding beyond the norm. Getting by is good enough because that is our lot in life. We have basic expectations and these are tied into our honor – we need food, shelter, water, electricity, and medical help just like everyone else.
Don’t expect any miraculous stories of hardship overcome, “personal best” in the Marathon, or an “I can make it on my own” attitude. These concepts are luxuries for people who live in pampered societies like America. Even when we are poor we have our families and that is enough to keep us happy. When you ask us to do something, we rarely think to ourselves, “Gee, how can I do a great job?” We are answering the call of our stomachs and our screaming wives. After that, a little coffee, some shisha, and leave us alone.
Our families make us who we are. The family is everything, and only those on the margins of society live without family support. Because we live in a developing country, and our needs are more survival oriented than yours, we have to rely on common survival techniques. People group together to survive, to protect each other, to look out for each others interests. The closer the grouping, the closer the interest of the group. Our immediate families are most important to us, then our larger families, then sub-tribe, then tribe, then tribal confederation.
Our loyalty expands and contracts based on our survival needs, but we almost always work within this construct. If you kill or imprison one of us, you have taken some of our pooled resources and reduced our chance of survival. Because we survive as a group, an attack on one is an attack on all. This is why we demand blood money for death, injury, and damage. You must replace the resource you have taken from our pool to balance things out. As long as you recognize that need, we can work together.
Pooling resources and interest within a family means that there is little room for individualism. We rarely choose our own path in life. If a father owns a business, the son will almost certainly work for his father. If marriage to another tribe solves an inter-tribal conflict, we marry who we are told. Our parents pick our spouses, and we often have little or no input in who we marry. Only the rich and the elite choose their own life. This lack of individuality further reduces our sense of individual responsibility. Again, don’t expect us to act like independent Americans.
Our tribalism is tightly bound to our sense of honor. Just as honor is vital to each one of us, it is also vital to the tribe. A dishonored tribe loses “wasta” and therefore influence. Less influence means less money, less power, less ability to support the members of the tribe. Therefore, a tribe’s honor is jealously guarded as a group resource. Mistreating a sheikh of our tribe makes him less powerful, making all of us less powerful. Less power means fewer contracts, less money, less food, angrier families. We must regain this honor any way we can. Because Iraqi tradition is violent, we often choose violence to regain our honor. If you dishonor our tribe, we have to negotiate with you…. or attack you until our honor is restored.
We don’t ask for much. Our standard of living is low compared to the Western world. If you put us in the United States, most of us would fall well below your poverty level. Since the collapse of the economy last year, many of us cannot afford to feed our families without finding odd jobs, begging money from family members, or supporting the Anti-Coalition Forces. Look around – most of us live in humble homes, farming small plots with a few animals and a broken down car. If we have a big home, we may have had a good job before the war and now we have nothing and are twice as angry as our poor neighbors.
There are certainly rich people amongst us, but they don’t represent the majority. When you tell us you can improve our lives and make us rich, you have an image of your own homes in mind. Most of us cannot even imagine what your lives must be like in America, and we do not necessarily value what you value. We don’t dream of Outback Steakhouse. We are proud of our lives even if they don’t meet your expectations.
Unlike you, we do not enjoy the protection of concerned government leaders. Nobody cares if there is lead in our water or pollution in the air. Sometimes our leaders feign concern about our healthcare system, but that’s only because our harried tribal leaders take up our cry. Your system is so refined that every little whimper draws the ire of a champion congressman. Our system is so broken our raging screams barely make a sound. We must use the power of our tribes and our religious groups to effect any change, so again, if you weaken our affiliations you weaken our only hope of being heard.
Where you have been protected from invasion, martial law, and torture for nearly two centuries, we have experienced nothing but invasion, martial law, and torture for our entire lives. We have been in a state of almost constant warfare with either the US or with Iran. When we weren’t fighting you, we were fighting ourselves in the north and the south. Our sons and brothers were killed fighting to keep Saddam in power, and our lives seemed painfully short. At any time, a government official, police officer, or secret policeman could decide that we had done something wrong and have us killed. They might have to pay off some blood money, but so what?
Just as many of you have become callous about death in combat, we have grown up to be callous about death in everyday life. We are not the Baghdad elite. All of us have seen animals slaughtered and have helped pull their guts from their bodies, so blood is nothing new to us. Beatings are a part of life, pain is a part of life, and death is an ever-present part of life. If pain and death are our lot in life, we accept that as part of God’s plan. This is how we are able to accept money for a relative you have killed – we accept God’s will, and you have balanced out our resources. What can we complain about?
Because our lives are so brutal, we have almost no capacity to view the long term. Our inability to envision our own futures is our greatest weakness. We are faced with a simple hierarchy of needs. One must breathe before he can think about shelter and security, shelter and security before water, water before food, and so on. It is only by building a normal, healthy society that you can extend that focus into the long range, to think about things like education, leisure time, investment, and retirement. You have heard our complaints. We want shelter, security, water, and food. Your talk about democracy and culture and prosperity mean little to people who are simply surviving.
With this short term view, if you give us money we spend it. If you give money to one of our public officials, he’ll steal as much as he can because he doesn’t even know if he’ll have a job next week. He has to get more, now, to fulfill basic needs. He can’t see into the long term, to see the effect his corruption will have on the future of his community. He may even be a good person, but he has to look out for his family first.
What you see as corruption we see as part of the normal process of doing business. Because most jobs underpay, we always take a cut. This is built into the price of the job. Iraq follows the trend of many other Arab countries – there aren’t enough jobs for the expanding population so the government hires everyone. The government can’t afford high salaries for so many people, so the pay is low. Because the pay is low, it’s expected that you accept bribes and cheat to get by. Everyone knows the rules, even the government.
Typically, we’ll take a slice of 10% to 15% off the top of a contract or a work order. Nobody will really get too upset if we keep things in this “normal” range. If we go too far, and take 30% or higher, then we know we are stepping over the line. However, unless you catch on we’ll take what we can get. If you’re too stupid to figure out what we’re doing, it’s your fault, not ours. There is no real shame in corruption; after all, we’re looking out for our families as expected.
Corruption is natural in a country without the rule of law. We do not respect law the way you do because for us law comes from the end of a gun. In the absence of the gun, we try to respect our families and friends and live by God’s will. If the government passes laws, or you give us a transitional law, we don’t respect it because we don’t respect the government. Government to us means corruption, violence, dictatorship, and rule by fear. In the absence of fear, there is no rule.
We know that Saddam lied to us often. We feel that he did this to protect us, but also to protect himself. We have never trusted our social institutions as much as we trust our families and our friends. It all comes back to the family and tribe. If the government tells us that the Americans are going to enter our town in peace, but our cousin tells us they are coming to murder everyone and rape our women, we will almost always believe our cousin. You have made many promises to us, but kept so few. Why should we believe you? In the absence of trusted institutions, our lives are ruled by rumor, and rumor is spread by word of mouth.
In such a nebulous society, where life is a tenuous prospect, we rarely take responsibility for our own actions. “Owning up” for our poor performance or behavior would be a stupid thing to do if it reduces our chance of survival and success. If we can put off our mistakes on others, we’ll do it in a heartbeat not because we’re lazy or incompetent but to avoid damaging our honor and possibly losing our jobs. Remember, without honor and a job, we are nothing. So we break a few rules and lie about our mistakes. We don’t care about rules anyway; we do things to achieve an effect not because they’re right or wrong.
We’re masters of achieving effect. Everything we do is designed to coax, cajole, trick, or steer you into doing what we want you to do. This is a standard survival skill, one that you obviously haven’t mastered. Your naiveté never ceases to amaze us. You either take us at face value, or you get mad when we “lie.” It’s not lying if you get what you want, and we almost always get what we want from you. We are in a constant state of negotiation, and there are no permanent solutions to any problem. You pretend to be so honest, but we see you as the biggest liars of all. You promised us security, jobs, and peace. All we have is crime, unemployment, and war. Who’s the liar?
You may have noticed we have a very emotional nature. There’s no imperative to control our emotions, and in fact we’re encouraged to express ourselves. We wear everything on our sleeves, and we change our minds at will. We can be furious at you one minute when you offend us, and truly love you the next minute. Every death is a massacre, every accident a murder, every threat is an impending disaster.
Iraqis are complicated people. We can be kind, generous, and forgiving in the worst circumstances. If you are a visitor in our homes, we will feed you our last morsel of food. If you become a true friend, we will die for you. But we see no future for ourselves or for our families.
We are stuck in a rut, and we need someone who has the capacity to see a better future to guide us onto the right path. We may take your hand, or we may bite your hand because we do not trust you. It is on your head to be patient and forgiving, not ours. Do not expect us to be American Marines. If you expect too much from us, you will be disappointed. There is nothing worse than unmet expectations, my friend.

…Iraqis will never live up to the Marines’ expectations because they are Iraqis, not American Marines. We haven’t lived up to their expectations either…

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Standing in lines...

2005-05-23T15:06:00.000-07:00

Another day standing in a line on a military base, except this day was different. Today was like Christmas come early - I received some specialty equipment for my impending trip to places hot and sandy. Oakley sunglasses, camelback hydration system, desert t-shirts, socks and boots.

I can thank all the soldiers before me who have been deployed and who (I am sure) voiced their opinions to decision makers on what they thought was necessary equipment to have above and beyond the "standard issue".

2005-05-22T05:53:00.000-07:00

This is a nature shot I took with my new digital camera. How do you like it?

Let me catch everyone up...

2005-05-22T05:30:00.000-07:00

Okay, here is where I have been and what I have been done for the past several weeks.

I guess I should first mention that I am excited to be going over to Iraq - I do feel strongly that I can help the people of Iraq in whatever part of Iraq I am asked to "serve". I feel like (for me) I am doing my part in response to what happened on September 11, 2001. That was quite a pivotal day for me; it was then that I recognized that the USA can do a better job of promoting what is good about America but also an obligation it has to seek out the "bad guys". Saddam Hussein is a bad guy and I am glad we are in his country trying to help the vast majority of the Iraqi people become a self-governing nation with economic and political relationships with the West. I know that this sounds idealistic to some and that not everything is black and white, such as the many reasons why the USA chose to invade this country and not others - but for a guy like me who is soon to be "on the ground", working with many good and decent Iraqi people...the high level ideologies are irrelevant to me now. What I know is that I have the opportunity to make a positive difference in the lives of everyday Iraqi families through what I do in the Army. As a Civil Affairs officer I will be involved in reconstruction and humanitarian aid projects with the end state being more electricity, better water treatment services, improved school buildings and supplies, etc...than ever before that was realized under the rule of a ruthless dictator.

Okay, now that I am off my soapbox let me recap some key events over the past several weeks.

When I first got mobilized I conducted some weapons training in California. The base there was good in that I got a chance to meet the rest of my unit. There are some great people that I am working with at the moment - we certainly have a sense of humor! After a few weeks there we went to North Carolina for some other training, including weapons qualification, combat skills refresher training, medical training, and some good cultural briefs. In the near future I will be "shipping out" to Iraq and must say that I am really looking for to working my new assignments over there.

I have also had the chance to visit with family and friends while in North Carolina. I really do appreciate all the comments I receive on this website - it makes the deployment that much easier when I feel like I am regularly communicating with people I care about.

Until I get settled in Iraq and have a laptop computer with internet access that I can access daily, it might be a while before I can write but stay tuned....All the best...CPT C

My first very own website

2005-05-18T05:27:00.000-07:00

Hey folks.

This is first test e-mail. If successful, each of you will get to read my weekly (he says ambitiously) journal entries on life in Iraq from my perspective.

When you write back to me please remember a few important guidelines.

1. Don't call me by my first name or last name - "hey buddy" or something like that will do. This is a public website which means ANYONE can read this.

2. Please don't allude to where I live or where I have lived.

3. Let me know who you are - first name is all I need OR last name but not both.

4. Please do reply to my entries whenever you want to - I look forward to your correspondence.

thanks